Cups of coffee poured onto my bed, soaking into the mattress: 1
Number of times a boy has to bang open and closed a DVD cabinet in order to knock off a brand new Heartwood Creek snowman, thus chipping it: 3
Number of times one toddler has to slam the lid of a piano to knock down a lovely silver ornament tree from the top: 1
Delicate White House ornaments hanging from said ornament tree when it fell: 7
Number of them damaged: surprisingly maybe only 2, and then it's just a slight bend; these are actually pretty sturdy
Number of times children have to pull (electric) candles from our living room windows before we realize they are dangerous and could break and just give up and take them down: at least twice a day for at least a week
Days the tree was up before installing child-deterring fence: 3
Ornaments pulled off before then: at least 12 per day
Ornaments pulled off since: only about 1 or 2 a day, so an improvement
Wheels that have broken off of the favorite, beloved John Deere tractor ornament: 2
Dollar amount of the current bid to replace this ornament from ebay: $2.25 (plus $5 shipping-assuming of course that I would go to all that trouble and that I would win the bid)
Number of years until I can have nice things: dear god, let it be less than 18!!!
Christmas cards I am short: 23
Number of people my husband swears we don't know well enough to send them a card: 77
Time outs had by three-year-old today: 4
Number of toys taken away: 2 (these are whole groups of toys, we don't just take away one Thomas train when he owns 50 of them, they are all on the top of my fridge)
Number of children for sale: 2
Minimum bid: a nickel
Edited to add: Bidding is now closed. I sparked a bidding war this morning between the two grandmothers. The children will be spending time with both in the next couple of days for an undisclosed amount.
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8 comments:
This has got to be one of my favorite posts ever! Is this what I have to look forward to when Will can walk and talk?? Can't wait to see the caged tree on Thursday!
Tis the season, huh? At least you'll get a break with the grandparents wanting time with them. Sounds promising. ;)
Hmm. I should open up bids sometime. Like last night when Emma refused all dinner put before her expect for marshmellows.
Are you peeking in my window??? Sounds just like my house. I think I need to auction min off, too.
Well, at least the grandparents are happy to take them off your hands. You can have nice things, they just need to be really, really high up. ;)
Holy crap...
My tress is uber small and placed up high. It might stay this way for years.
Best of luck to you!
We can swap for a few days? lol.. maybe it will freak some sense into them!
How wonderful to have the support of your 'fathers'. I only ever had one child toddling and I take my hat off to all you mums out there with multiple toddlers. But don't worry, you can have nice things again in about 3 years I reckon. Chin up :-D
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